Let’s say you’re starting to notice some warning signs that cause you to worry about your father’s ability to continue to take care of himself. Perhaps he is struggling to maintain the home the way he always has. Or maybe he had a close call while driving that could have caused injury to himself or another person. Maybe he just seems more disoriented lately. Whatever the reason, you’ve decided to talk with him about home care services. The problem is, he refuses to even entertain the idea. What are you to do when a parent refuses care that they desperately need?
These ideas can be helpful:
- Let him know you’re in this together. Trying to force the issue of care at home is a surefire way to create conflict. If you have differing opinions, take time to respectfully listen to your parent’s perspective, and focus on areas of common ground the two of you share.
- Be patient. It often will require more than one conversation for an older adult to accept the idea of in-home care. It is a big life change, and may feel intrusive to the person’s sense of independence, freedom, and control. If the discussion becomes upsetting to either of you, consider revisiting the conversation again later.
- Compromise. Your parent may be resistant to the prospect of a “caregiver,” but would he/she be open to having an assistant on hand to help with organizing files, for example? Or having some help at home with housekeeping, doing laundry, and preparing meals?
If safety is a concern, of course, you will want to talk with your parent’s doctor for direction. Receiving a recommendation from a trusted professional often carries more weight than from a family member. The doctor may also relieve your concerns by offering an alternative solution, such as modifying the home or making changes to their medication regimen to reduce the risk of a fall.
At Chesapeake Caregivers, we customize our care plan according to each person’s specific needs and wishes. We would be happy to sit down and talk with you and your parent(s) about the many different ways we can offer support while respecting independence.
Contact us at 410.919.0190 to schedule a free in-home assessment to learn more about our home care services.
This information was derived from KFF Health News and AARP
